The ManicaPost
TIMELINESS is a news value.
This is from the elementary studies of journalism.
However, there are situations that transcend timeliness as a news value.
People’s knowledge about something or lack of it, even if it happened a decade ago, can determine its newsworthiness.
This is the scenario with one of our dear brothers.
I’m talking about that hardware entrepreneur who has done considerably well in selling building material.
However, the pillar of his business remains worrisome.
Blabber is not just another jealous punk who is bent on denigrating our respected businessman.
No! If anything, Blabber is a great admirer of hard work and ethical conduct.
This is the reason Yours Truly sees everything bad about the conduct of this entrepreneur who is in the habit of impregnating women, enticing them to abort the pregnancies in exchange of some handsome payments and then collecting the foetuses and the blood.
The ‘merchandise’ is taken to a neighbouring country where they are surrendered as blood sacrifices that ostensibly enables his business to thrive.
While this sounds like unbelievable folklore, this has been the backbone of our dear brother’s business.
Get it from me.
Those that doubt this are free to hit Yours Truly’s inbox for more.
No doubt, the next instalment of your favourite column will have the ABCs of where and how many times this has happened!
For now, Yours Truly quickly moves on to this other laughable act of promiscuity.
Word reaching Yours Truly is that a young adult who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth was caught pants down with a married woman at this other well-known lodge in the valley.
Dear reader, there was pandemonium as the illicit lovebirds who were having the time of their lives suddenly found themselves running like headless chickens after their nest was invaded by the fella’s wife.
Blabber understands why this spoilt brat had no time to try and manage the leakage of information relating to this drama.
Just like the violent demonstrations and looting unfolding where they are demanding the release of an imprisoned former leader, it was so hectic and chaotic that apart from the normal service bills, he also has to pay for damaged furniture.
Furthermore, there are obvious matrimonial issues to be settled.
Yours Truly will certainly return with an update on how wifey reacted to all this drama, what happened to the union back home and of course, how our dear businessman’s son is coping.
For now let us just continue washing our hands, observing physical distancing and wearing our face masks.
Always remember, whatever we are not changing, we are choosing!
