The ManicaPost
Lovemore Kadzura
FORCED and child marriages are some of the most traumatic and dehumanising situations a young female person can go through and it is not easy to get out of the predicament. The unpleasant experiences are also worsened by the society, including close relatives who instead of offering assistance, blames, mocks and neglects victims of rape, forced and underage marriage, a forced marriage survivor has said.
In an interview on the sidelines of International Women’s Day commemorations at Rukweza High School in Makoni South last Saturday, Ruvimbo Topodzi (20), said although it was very difficult to get out of a forced marriage, one can gather the courage and move on to restart a new fresh life.
Ruvimbo together with Loveness Madzuru last year made history when they succesfully convinced the Constitutional Court to outlaw child marriages.Narrating her story, she said within a day, her life turned into hell after her father chased her away from home when she saw her walking with a man who was proposing love to her.
Even her mother could not help the situation as she failed to calm down her angry husband.
“The worst thing that can happen to a young girl is to be forced into marriage. Life within a day had dramatically and drastically changed as I was exposed to a whole new life unexpectedly. Everything turned upside down. The only thing that I was clinging on was hope that one day things will be better for me.
“My father chased me from home when I was in Form Three aged 15 and the man was 22 years.
During the course of the forced marriage I was assaulted, raped and subjected to all forms of ill-treatment. My husband would beat me up severely even when I was heavily pregnant.
“I did not have anywhere to turn to for assistance. I was trapped in hell. When you are in such a situation you lose all your value, dignity and confidence. Your own relatives and in-laws will be labeling you a woman of loose morals. Finally one day my father saw me with bruises while I was about to give birth and he accepted me back home,” she narrated.
Ruvimbo further said that it was not the end of the world to young girls who find themselves in situations like hers as there was a better life after abuse.
She said they should use their nasty experiences to work hard and also get an education.
“It is not easy to run away from a forced and abusive marriage because the same person who is abusing you is the one who is basically providing for all your survival needs such as shelter, food and other basic needs. But what is important is to gather courage and walk away for good.
“I am now back at school and I will be sitting for my O-Level examinations this year. A certain lady based in South Africa is funding my education. Education is power and life.
Young girls must value their education and stop engaging in sex before marriages because when you are not educated, a man will not respect you. It is not easy to abuse an educated woman.
“At first I wanted to be a nurse, but with the experience I had I now want to be a lawyer so that one day I will represent oppressed people.
